Romans 12:1-2 – “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

How many believers struggle with hearing from God? I did. I struggled for years, three years to be exact. In 2011 my heart was convicted in how I was living my “Christian” life. God was tugging on my heart, whispering my name…I could feel him… but I did nothing.

Time would pass, but the conviction never did. It just continued to grow stronger until I could finally no longer ignore or deny it. I began to write in my journal about this and would ask God to tell me what He wanted. There was no answer – just an empty feeling in my heart with a side of conviction.

For 2 years this pattern continued. I believe this is the definition of Insanity – keep doing the same thing, yet expecting a different result.

Up until this point my prayers to God went something like this “Hey God, I need you to tell me what you want.” “God, why can’t you just tell me what you want me to do.” (IE make it easy on me – don’t make me actually have to do any work in figuring this out!). “Come on God, I’m sick of feeling this way, just tell me what you want and I’ll do it.”

God knew better. I wouldn’t do it because I was not mature enough as a believer. His timing is always perfect. If this happened in the timing I wanted it would have failed for sure.

Finally, one day I had a realization. Maybe it would be a good idea to actually try and LISTENED to God.

I decided to dedicate an hour every morning to getting into God’s word – to understand better who He is, what He wants, How He speaks, and how to understand what He is saying.

It was in this time that SLOWLY my eyes began to see more clearly my real relationship with God. It was mediocre at best. How thankful am I that God never grows weary of his selfish and slow-to-catch-on people.

As I drew closer to God in His word – I GREW closer to Him in my heart, my soul and my mind. He became real to me again. You may ask what I mean by real??? I mean present – A present being, a present Father, a present friend, a present provider, a present protector…PRESENT [spiritually and physically with me].

As my relationship with Christ grew stronger, the desires of this earth had lessened. Everything started feeling so temporal to me, so fleeting. God has captured my heart for the eternal.

Please know this was NOT an overnight transformation – but a three plus year process of yelling, crying, begging, forgetting, sinning, working, sleeping, toiling, and did I say yelling?? Yes, I yelled at God a lot over these three years. I couldn’t understand the calling, the burden He had placed within me and that was frustrating and scary all at once. I was fearful of making any decision because I was scared to make the wrong one. I still didn’t know what He was saying to me. All I knew was that what I was currently doing was not my calling – my gifts were meant for more – and that He had something different for my life.

Romans 12:1-2 is a verse that I wish I read a few years ago. Then maybe I would have understood earlier that in order to hear from God and understand His will – I need to give my life COMPLETELY over to Him, and offer my life as a living sacrifice to Him. That I need to give up the patterns and cares of this world and to live in full obedience to Him.

No one can serve two masters and that is what I was doing. I was serving self, I was serving worldly idols. I was NOT serving God…until now.

Fellow believer, if you are hearing from God but struggling to understand what He is saying, press in to Him deeper. Offer yourself as a living sacrifice for God and put this world behind you…He will guide your steps and will make clear where you should be and you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is for your life – His good, pleasing and perfect will!