What are you saying God???

November 15, 2014November 15, 2014 tammyrimer Listening to God, What's in my heart God cares for your needs, Gods will, hearing from God, In God's hands, Jesus lives, listening to God, praying, Reading the Bible, Romans, Talking to God, voice of god, voice of truth, waiting for God

Romans 12:1-2 – “Therefore, I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God – this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – His good, pleasing and perfect will.”

How many believers struggle with hearing from God? I did. I struggled for years, three years to be exact. In 2011 my heart was convicted in how I was living my “Christian” life. God was tugging on my heart, whispering my name…I could feel him… but I did nothing.

Time would pass, but the conviction never did. It just continued to grow stronger until I could finally no longer ignore or deny it. I began to write in my journal about this and would ask God to tell me what He wanted. There was no answer – just an empty feeling in my heart with a side of conviction.

For 2 years this pattern continued. I believe this is the definition of Insanity – keep doing the same thing, yet expecting a different result.

Up until this point my prayers to God went something like this “Hey God, I need you to tell me what you want.” “God, why can’t you just tell me what you want me to do.” (IE make it easy on me – don’t make me actually have to do any work in figuring this out!). “Come on God, I’m sick of feeling this way, just tell me what you want and I’ll do it.”

God knew better. I wouldn’t do it because I was not mature enough as a believer. His timing is always perfect. If this happened in the timing I wanted it would have failed for sure.

Finally, one day I had a realization. Maybe it would be a good idea to actually try and LISTENED to God.

I decided to dedicate an hour every morning to getting into God’s word – to understand better who He is, what He wants, How He speaks, and how to understand what He is saying.

It was in this time that SLOWLY my eyes began to see more clearly my real relationship with God. It was mediocre at best. How thankful am I that God never grows weary of his selfish and slow-to-catch-on people.

As I drew closer to God in His word – I GREW closer to Him in my heart, my soul and my mind. He became real to me again. You may ask what I mean by real??? I mean present – A present being, a present Father, a present friend, a present provider, a present protector…PRESENT [spiritually and physically with me].

As my relationship with Christ grew stronger, the desires of this earth had lessened. Everything started feeling so temporal to me, so fleeting. God has captured my heart for the eternal.

Please know this was NOT an overnight transformation – but a three plus year process of yelling, crying, begging, forgetting, sinning, working, sleeping, toiling, and did I say yelling?? Yes, I yelled at God a lot over these three years. I couldn’t understand the calling, the burden He had placed within me and that was frustrating and scary all at once. I was fearful of making any decision because I was scared to make the wrong one. I still didn’t know what He was saying to me. All I knew was that what I was currently doing was not my calling – my gifts were meant for more – and that He had something different for my life.

Romans 12:1-2 is a verse that I wish I read a few years ago. Then maybe I would have understood earlier that in order to hear from God and understand His will – I need to give my life COMPLETELY over to Him, and offer my life as a living sacrifice to Him. That I need to give up the patterns and cares of this world and to live in full obedience to Him.

No one can serve two masters and that is what I was doing. I was serving self, I was serving worldly idols. I was NOT serving God…until now.

Fellow believer, if you are hearing from God but struggling to understand what He is saying, press in to Him deeper. Offer yourself as a living sacrifice for God and put this world behind you…He will guide your steps and will make clear where you should be and you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is for your life – His good, pleasing and perfect will!

Falling Away

December 29, 2012 tammyrimer Believers standing strong, Voice of Clarity, What's in my heart listening to God, spirituality, Talking to God, voice of god, voice of truth

In these times of confusion and right seeming wrong and wrong seeming right in the eyes of the world, it is easy for believers to become confused and accepting of what the world says is right. There is a clear “falling away” of believers as their once black and white beliefs become a pale gray.

We, as believers, need to be the hands and feet and Clear VOICE of God…of truth.

I have been struggling with where my voice is…what God would have me do and say. Who to say it to and how to say it. I have struggled with the burden on my heart of stepping out and speaking loudly for God. Yet I have stayed back, talking behind closed doors, but very seldom having the guts and bravery to be a beacon of light and a voice of truth in public. I am a business owner and I think I feared mixing the two. But at the end of the day – above all else, I am a child of God first and that trumps all.

So where do we go from here? What is our ministry? What would God have me do with this desire of being His hands, feet and voice to this dying world?

As I sit here asking God to tell me what to do, a thought, a memory came to me. I truly believe God gave us the family structure to show and explain His relationship with us. I sit here and think if my daughter came to me and said “Mom, what should I do with my life? Tell me what you want me to do.” I would say, “do whatever is in your heart, what you desire to do, BUT in everything glorify God and don’t hurt others.”

So why would our God, our Father, be any different? Why would He give a book (the Bible) that tells us how to live if He has set in stone what we are to do already? He wants us to make the decision of what to do on our own. There is no wrong answer in missing His calling for my life. His calling is for me to live a righteous life, glorifying Him and living this time, He gave me, based on what is in my heart.

It is up to me to choose my course in a way that is pleasing and acceptable to Him. He has not set a specific task for me but rather has loved me through it all and is allowing me to find my way and glorifying Him as I walk through this journey.

Ah such clarity! So now it is time to find my Mission, my voice and glorify God.

What’s in my heart

December 29, 2012December 31, 2012 tammyrimer Listening to God, What's in my heart listening to God, Talking to God

It is about 7:45 AM on Saturday morning. I awoke at 7:15 and knew a snow storm came in the night. I went to the window to peak out at the “damage” and instead was greeted with a beautiful scene of soft lovely snow, covering a peaceful world.

I could not close the window curtain again to hide the light and go back to sleep. Instead I lye here in the darkness with only the light from the early morning sky coming in as I stare out the window from my bed, at this beautiful scene.

How perfect and peaceful everything looks. I hate the fact that soon the world will awake and disturb this beautiful scene of soft stillness.

As I lay here my mind continues to go towards God and the wonder of what is to come. It is silly but in my mind I think God has a special love for me – we have a special relationship and He won’t allow me to be hurt. Then I step back into reality, realizing all of those who have gone before me who were much more faithful to God and I’m sure felt the same way – that somehow they were protected from the pain and fear of death.

I talk to God a lot. He is usually the first one I talk to when I wake and is usually the last one I talk to when I lay to sleep. The problem is, I do all the talking. I have never been properly trained on how to LISTEN to God. Because of this, I feel trapped in a life of guessing, with a great fear of doing anything because I fear what I am doing is listening to myself and not the instruction of God and so I only stand still and then end up (after a time of standing) feeling angry, sad and frustrated.